The internal me?

Dated April 2010

How do you perceive me in this photo?

Honestly

Nothing to perceive, this is me !

I dont want to pretend that i'm a simple pure woman.

I dont want to pretend that i'm so lady.

I may have just show you my middle finger if you pissed me off when i'm driving, which technically i did it before in my uni campus.

Days ago i was asking one of my friend. Do you feel i'm "girl" enough? Or, am i a GIRL? This seems like doesnt shocked him at all. He didnt answer me directly. In fact he just reply me with a question, "what do you mean by not GIRL enough?"...caused me some time to explain this more further and detail.

i mean like, look at the girls around, went shopping for clothes and shoes, discussing which one look more slim perhaps? Discussing which facial product are you using? What kind of eyelashes you use? How many clothes you have bought for new year? What do you want to wear for any dates or occasions? Chatting about  manicure and pedicure. Discuss about how that charming guy contact her lately. Gossiping about fashion magazines. Discuss about how to slim down. How much for the shoes she bought lately. And much more.

how about me? Mixing around with people that modifying cars, discussing about how Nani pretended injured or real injured? talking about Nasri. Talking about Vtech sound, Dyno test, drift,body roll, sport spring sport absorber....i dont like manicure or pedicure, in fact i dont even let my fingers nails grow long. in fact i hate girls with long fingers and they still let their nails grow longer and longer, i only perceive it as zombie instead of "oh,is so pretty!". I forgot when is the last time i wear high heel shoes. i dont even crazy about branded stuff. Nothing extra on my face besides the facial cleanser and the cream doctor gave.

 Mask? hmm, i totally forgotten when is the last time i did that too. i used to have a lot of accessories but now all lying dead in the box. Earring, hmm..how long that i last wear an earring? dont remember. i dont even like those earrings that hanging around, felt annoying for me. What else? i dont think i have as much make up items as normal girls, because i only got 5-6 steps in my make up process. Eyelashes, eyeliner, foundation, shadow and blush. what else? dont know. i dont even clearly understand the usage of BB cream, seriously. I like to wear casual,simple, shirt or singlet match with shorts then here am i, ready to go for even movies or whatever. Those pretty dress, skirts and high heel are only for clubbing session or wedding dinner or whatever special occasions. Normally girls spend their money on shoppings for clothes and accessories, but most of my money goes to my car instead. 

Today they gave me an answer with a statement.

I may physically a girl, but my characteristic, obviously is not.

however, in many areas, i still declare myself as a typical lady.

Dont worry that i'm still a female, not shemale.*lol*