Shirley Qiu's mind set

What is always on my mind?

How do i always think about things?

I guess i found some old posts from my Wretch blog that could describe how do i think about things, interaction between human i guess *lol*. Well it might be a very boring long post and yet this is what i was thinking. Just a post with purely my own personal thoughts. This is me, so? lol

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Actually , human love to solve what is [ not owns ] matters. Human feeling of powerlessness because we tend to take responsibilities which are not ours. If someone fall into pain, no need to worry and sad because that pain will let him grow up, If the pain will give him new life then just let it be. Sometimes help might not just harm him, might harm ourself as well.

For year we realized, we tend to help others to ease their pain, to take their burden and put on owns shoulder, and following up, is we tend to exhausted with it. The main reason of our feeling of powerlessness, is we tend to take task that is not ours, we tend to change things that cannot or dont want to change. Of course , i know and understand the feeling of difficulties. Difficulties of let it be the person that we care, the person that we worry, especially when they are spoiling themselves. But what you can do? If you can, this situation wont be happening right? In reality, we found out that many people are over worried. Cannot let it be of many things, worrying their parents,children,old folks in home, spoiling friends. But then, human have to grow up. If we gave too much care to him, his heart will getting delicate even their heart at first can get stronger. If we keep giving walking stick, how could he grown up? Over protected someone is not a good thing because he cannot learn to move on himself.

Human, wants to live in happiness. First of all they have to know how to differenciate this is [who's] matters. Bryon Katie said that on this world there are three matters : [My matters] [Your matters] and [God matters].

There is a real life case:

A person found out that he suffering with lung's cancer. Following, he practices an attitude. He left his cancer to the doctor because this is [Your matters] not [My matter]. He left his soul to the God, because this is [God matters] not [My matters]. Then he do what he should do on the days he left because that is [My matters]. That is how he keep himself out of worry and sad, because he is doing what is his matters, what he should do at this moment instead of worrying cancer can be cured or not, worrying when he will passed away.

Remember, vexation and trouble will not come and find you unless you find them yourself.

Fortunately, God never give us what we wanted. Whenever we cannot get what we wanted, we often blame the God for it. But when time passes, then we will realized when God didnt give what we wanted, often there will be a deeper kindness and goodwill. We wont missed anything. What we missed is actually not ours. We might missed Plan A, but maybe God already arrange Plan B for us. Looking back the past, all those frustration we've been through, now only we realized those frustration actually equals to belated blissfulness. Who knows it from the start?

God set road blocks in our life is not wanted us to jump higher. God wants us to take another way and we will find another scenery, we will learn from the other road God wants us to take.

When we come to this world, we didnt bring anything. We own our life after we came to this world. So, dont sad or worry of losing everything in your life. No big deal. Just have to remember the fact that we come to this world without anything. The worst, we only getting back to the starting point, where we starting to get everything we have now. Looking back all these years, everything is keep losing and dissapearing. No matter how much blissfulness we have, our happy family, lovely couple, friendship but when impermanence comes around, things still will losing and dissapearing. Is just the matter of time. So dont hold-on on something overly. Eventually we know we cannot take away anything when we passed away.

Actually in reality, when we lose something,we tend to get something in return, when we got something,we will lose something as well. Life is like this, God never let our life be perfect. Without flaws, how we learn? Normally people tend to remember deeper on their lose rather than what actually they get in return. They tend to unseen what they get from the lose. Open your heart, find what you got in return. Sometime you might unseen it, sometimes its intangible. But is there for us to discover ourself, be grateful on what you got in return. 

All wrong-doing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed can wrong-doing remain? { Buddha }

Mind makes what we act, agree? Hmmm....In fact, we are stuck in the over uphold of owns' concept, something that we overly hold on but we do not aware of it. Why sometimes we feel sad, vexed, pain and maybe thinking of ending our life? Sad people might say :" i'm poor,so i'm sad" but there are peoples that even poor than you but they dont vexed. Vexed people might say :" losing job will let me in hunger, so i'm vexed" but vexed can let you become rich? can let you found your job? Pain people might say :" how do i live without him/her?" but before you owns him/her, you still living nicely what. People who thinking suicide might say :" why God be so cruel to me?" but how do you know God do not have other better arrangement for you?

Blissfulness, is not without flaws, is not perfect at all. Life makes people grown up because of its flaws. If is perfect, how people going to grow up. With flaws, you learn how to accept it, make perfect out of flaws. Just remember, the thing that you lack of in your life, it might belongs to other people, but the thing you owned, might be people's defect. Life is like this. And, actually, flaws can be blissful as well, but with condition you have to be satisfied. When do human going to satisfy ? Hmm... and dissatisfies are mostly comes from comparing. Maybe from the past or from other people, maybe i'm satisfied with my bonus this year but what if i found out that i'm lower than other people? Here comes the dissatisfaction. Technically we are searching for better life or happiness but then in fact we are searching for misfortune. Because, if you do not know how to satisfy, then how could you be happy with your life now?

One person wants to be happy, this might not difficult to achieve. But if they wants to become happier than other, this may be very difficult, because others might not as happy as we thought { Markjohns }

Still this quotation that i like

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.

Written by: Shirley Qiu [ 11th October 2010 ]

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Wow, cannot believe it was that long. Doesnt seems to be so long when it was in Wretch blog. *lol* Anyhow, this is basically what i wrote for more than half a year ago. Still, it's not statement or guideline or anything that you could possibly think of, this is just a personal thoughts of mine. 

This is who i am, Shirley Qiu. *smile*